Am I an Us or a Them?

I was certain

we had irreconcilable differences,

    that you felt contempt for me

 or even hatred.

 

I reinforced boundaries,

    protected my tender heart,

        and shut the rusted gate

    which led to that realm.

 

I secured the gate,

    hid the key,

        and declared the heart within

    battened and safe.

 

And I stayed away

    as dust gathered in those shadowy chambers.

 

Today, I feel your hand

    lightly brush mine as we

        mourn,

    side by side.

 

Probably unintended, I think, and that's fine.

 

Then again, 

    a spare touch,

        your soft fingers

    slipping into mine.

 

We wear the same grief in our eyes,

    and our hands 

        remember love,

    more than words cracked with age.

 

Hands, softly touching,

    eyes forward,

        all sounds cease

    in the swell of warmth across this iron gate.

 

Like a sun-bright morning,

    I feel the key

        as you press it into my palm.

 

Tenderly, you say

    Sweetheart, 

        I think it's time to go in.   

 

 

 

 

 

The Emporer

We tried to be good citizens.

We voted and kept up with the news,

We tended to the health of our communities.

 

We care.

 

Yet, here we are, in a world which celebrates despots

    at it's finest banquets,

as was demanded.

 

Now, we look to revolution.

    We revisit a past, where cruelty 

        faced courage and sacrifice,

    and was found wanting.

 

We stand up to bullies,

    We do not negotiate with terrorists.

 

We are patriots.

    Mama and Papa bears

        Protecting our nation

            With teeth. 

 

 

 

 

Melody

 

Traveling a life
     along these bones
Stretched highway measures femur
     Dark hollows through ilium
A quake in the belly
     Breath whispers a night sky

Heart pulses bright
        through stained bars
     Singing,
        open up. Open up.

And sometimes
     in moments kaleidoscopic
        and hushed
that cage does open up
     and a light drapes out
        which cannot be seen
A viscera that cannot
           be touched

But a song,
                yes,
       A song who can be sung.

Find me

Don't find me.

I'm here for you

Just not today.

They're reaching out.

The heart says

Take a number,

But they won't wait.

Some bang on the door,

Some walk away,

Others burn the place to the ground.

I said wait

I said I don't have room for more of you

I said I'm crumbling, can't you see?

And I crumble.

Just small bits at first,

Then like a fully burned log

 which has somehow maintained its shape,

I crumble to dust at the slightest disturbance.

No one can put me back together now.

I am all burned up

Cool ash in the fireplace

I am nirvana 

Dancing through infinite space

Find me

In the harmonic galaxy

That is our shared heart.

I am here with you. 

photo by Billy Smith

Gratitude Poem #19

What a gift

  To live this life

    In human form!

 

To feel touch

  and wind,

 deep emotion

   like undulating 

     waves on the sea

 

To see and hear

  beauty,

    nuanced and garish

   as it pours through

     and around

       this body.

 It's been awhile, I guess I better give a report!

I'm in a gift season currently, which is fun. For Mother's Day, I wrote mom a list of 50 things about her that I am grateful for. It was fun to think up! Lots of memories came through and it was surprisingly easy to get to 50. I thanked her for my Wonder Woman Underoos. I wish I still had them. 

I had a birthday event this past weekend and made a mix CD for my bandmate, Mr. Random. I always enjoy making these, but this one was extra fun because he wanted 'interesting/weird' music. I figured anything I am familiar with is probably also known to him, so I dove into Spotify and found lots of new stuff. It's a gift for both of us!

In work news, I'm finishing a small set of custom cherry door/window trim for some friends. I'm also about to embark on managing my own payroll rather than going through a service. Math! Details! I'm into it! 

What have you been up to?

Gratitude Poem #7

 Heart of the world

drums her landscape

in my chest.

From her dark hollows

I reach out

on the up beat -

in, on the down. 

Now you are beside me.

We reach out

on the up

in, on the down

 

Loving in synchronous time,

Polyphonous parade of divine.